NCIS vs Black Friday
by anonymousclarinet22
Summary: Ziva, Tony, and McGee are overseeing a staged drug sale to catch the dealer, the prime suspect in their murder investigation. The only problem? The “buyer” is a teenage girl, the drug sale is scheduled to take place in a department store…and it’s Black Friday.


NCIS vs. Black Friday

Ziva pulled into the parking space, quite sharply and at a significantly higher speed than recommended, and the two agents in the backseat cringed as the driver that had gotten there before them honked angrily. The teenage girl in the passenger seat, however, only tapped her perfectly manicured fake nails impatiently on the dashboard.

"Why, of all days, do we have to do this on Black Friday?" Tony complained, covering his ears; the other driver's horn was still blaring.

"Drug dealers don't exactly let us choose when they murder people," McGee replied sarcastically. Both of them were already done with this op, and it had barely even started. The group of four headed into the department store, and the clomping sound of the teenager's high heels only added to the cacophony of screeching tires, horns, ridiculously loud music, and angry shoppers yelling.

"Where to?" Tony asked the girl.

"Juniors clothes, of course," she replied, rolling her eyes, and began shoving her way towards that department.

"My clothes?" Tony asked, confused.

Ziva laughed. "She meant Juniors as in teenage girls, not as in Tony DiNozzo, Jr."

"Oh, right." They hurried after the girl before she was lost in the crowd.

"I do not understand this 'Black Friday,'" Ziva shouted over the noise as they passed the kitchen supplies department and the mob that was forming. "Why do Americans have a holiday about giving thanks when, the next day, they are beating each other up over a slightly discounted toaster oven?" In the mob, some guy got tackled, and said slightly discounted toaster oven went flying across the aisle. The crowd lunged towards it and the tackling began again.

Finally, they arrived at the Juniors clothes department. The girl began searching through the racks, occasionally picking up an article of clothing she liked.

"Is it just me, or does it look like she is shopping rather than focusing on the op?" Tony whispered.

"She's supposed to look like she's shopping; that's part of the op," McGee reminded him. Suddenly, the girl's phone buzzed and they all looked up. "Holiday decorations department!" she called. She and the three agents began the long, perilous journey swimming upstream to the complete opposite side of the store. McGee jumped to the left as an elderly man with a crazed expression almost decapitated him with a tube of wrapping paper he had forcibly removed from the hands of a four year old, who was now sobbing on the floor, in danger of getting trampled.

"Why do they have Christmas decorations up already? It's not even Thanksgiving yet!"

"Oh, come on, where's your holiday spirit, McGrinch?" Tony teased.

Ziva nudged him. "Three o'clock." The agents peeked discreetly over their right shoulders. Sure enough, their target was standing a few yards away, checking the price tag of a Christmas tree. When he looked up, McGee snatched a box of ornaments off a shelf and pretended to study it as Tony and Ziva moved into positions to surround the drug dealer.

The girl, who was supposed to be "buying" the drugs, approached the dealer, checking her phone for more instructions. Receiving none, she glanced up and made eye contact with Tony, who nodded encouragingly. The drug dealer somehow noticed, even though Tony should have been out of his field of vision, and glared suspiciously at the agent.

Suddenly, the Christmas tree beside the drug dealer was no longer beside him. The twelve foot tall, tinsel-covered tree swayed and toppled in Tony's direction. The senior field agent squawked in surprise, his eyes as wide as saucers, as the tree collided with his head. Their target had been tipped off.

"Tony!" Ziva yelled as he disappeared from view, breathing a sigh of relief as she spotted one of his feet flailing out from under the Christmas tree and quickly relocating her target, who was trying to make a run for it.

"I'm all right, just stuck," Tony reassured her as she sprinted off with her gun drawn. "I hate Black Friday!"

Meanwhile, the teenage girl was scared out of her already limited wits. "Did he just…get hit by a Christmas tree? What happened? Where is the drug guy? Are we gonna die?" she stuttered frantically, clutching McGee's shirt, shaking him, and practically sobbing in terror.

"Uh…no," McGee replied.

Across the department, Ziva shoved her way through the walls of people, desperately trying to catch up to the fleeing drug dealer. In her haste, she crashed into a lights display, causing even more chaos.

"Security! Stop shoving people, please!" one of the security personnel after Ziva as she continued chasing the drug dealer.

"Stop! No running!" the man yelled again, heading towards her.

The former assassin dodged a cane that an elderly woman stabbed in her direction in an attempt to impale an even older looking man as they fought over a set of winter-themed kitchen towels. "Why are you yelling at me?" Ziva challenged the security guy. "Those people are about to murder each other!" She tried to continue in pursuit of her target, but two additional security personnel stood in her way.

"NCIS! I am an NCIS agent!" she yelled, fumbling for her badge.

"That doesn't give you an excuse to shove people, ma'am," said the security guy. Ziva scowled, further infuriated by his use of "ma'am."

"Yes, it does! I am a federal—"

"Members of the National Coalition of Independent Scholars do not receive special privileges on Black Friday," he informed her.

"That's not what NCIS is! We are the Navy Criminal Investigative Service!" she shouted as she desperately tried to keep track of the drug dealer's rapidly disappearing form. "Oh, come on!"

"The what?"

"Navy! Criminal! Investigative! Service!" Struggling to see past the security guards, she scanned the crowd for her target. Her was gone.

Too late, Tony and McGee ran up with guns drawn, just in time to see a young kid try to tackle Ziva. "I want that Star Wars blaster!" he screeched.

"It's not a toy!" Ziva yelled indignantly, struggling to keep her pistol pointed in a safe direction while in a crowd and unsure of how to react to being attacked by a child. Tony tried and failed to stifle his laughter. "Where is the target?" McGee asked.

"He got away," Ziva growled, holstering her pistol. "Now you go away!" she ordered the kid who was attacking her. Thankfully, he was swept off in the crowd, which was now surging towards the last remaining inflatable snow globe.

"Got away? But you're a ninja!" said Tony, shocked.

"Who are you to talk? You got hit by a Christmas tree!" Ziva shot back.

"I hate Black Friday," McGee declared to no one in particular. The security guards looked on in confusion.

Mission failed.


End file.
